Banana Flavored Candy...

...you either like it, or you don't

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True story

Man goes to Forget Me Not Florist to purchase flowers on his debit card.
Man’s wife checks bank statement and realizes those flowers were not for her.
Man confesses to infidelity.
Memaw and co. are subpoenaed to submit evidence for the divorce proceedings.

Favorite story ever. What an idiot.